I spent most of the evening before his funeral service preparing the eulogy I was to give in his honor. When I walked through the doors of the Finegan Funeral home in Alpha, NJ I was shaking and didn't think that I could speak.
Buddy was a member of the fraternal organization, Freemasons and when his fellow members finished with their service it was my turn to speak. I prayed for God to calm my nerves, and give me the strength to honor my truly wonderful older brother. I honestly do not remember walking up to tho podium, but I did. Once I looked out into the packed funeral home, and saw the many familiar faces who all loved my brother and were there to honor him, I felt completely calm and at peace.
I spoke of a man who was often known for his wonderful sense of humor, family dedication, and a loyal friend to all who had the joy of knowing him. I remember a father who trudged through a blizzard snow storm on Christmas Eve from High Street to Seventh Avenue in Alpha to retrieve the bicycles he had assembled earlier at his parent's home. When I was a Brownie Leader in Alpha, my assistant's husband told me how he remembered seeing Buddy walking passed his home with a bicycle under each arm. How he epitomized fatherly love and dedication in it's purest state.
I remembered watching my brother do the limbo in our family run luncheonette which sat on the corner of Third and East Central Avenues in Alpha during the sixties. He would tease his three sisters, and we took it in stride. His sense of humor and timing were right on the mark, and he missed his calling as a comedian. Instead he devoted 45 years to Ingersoll Rand Co. in Phillipsburg, NJ as a machinist. He also was in a partnership with our father in Dunwell Tool and Machine.
He met his wife Joan at the Villa Roller Rink when he was 16, and she was 15. When he passed away on June 14, 2004 they had been married for over 43 years. They built their home on Vulcanite Avenue with the help of his sons, and father-in-law Stanley. He was so proud of his beautiful home, and family.
Buddy took great pride in the many accomplishments of his three sons, and got to see two of them go to college, and the other start a successful commercial greenhouse growing business. He often talked about how Frank Sinatra spoke at his son Craig's graduation from Stevens Institute of Technology, and how the revered Senator Wayne Dumont got extra tickets for Craig's grandfathers, and godfather to attend the ceremony. He and his wife flew to Ukraine to attend the lavish wedding celebration when Craig married his beautiful bride Luda. He so admired Craig's sacrifice of leaving a very high paying job as a Chemical Engineer to join the Peace Corps.
At his funeral several of his friends got up and spoke about their wonderful friend Buddy who will be sorely missed by all. At the end of my eulogy I said the following:
I am standing upon the shoreline.
A ship at my side spreads white sails to the morning breeze and starts for the blue ocean. It is an object of beauty and strength and I stand and watch it until at length it hangs like a speck of white clouds just where the sea and sky come down to mingle with each other.
Then someone at my side says, "There! It's gone!"
"Gone where?"
"Gone from my sight, that's all". It is just as large in mast and spar and hull as ever it was when it left my side; floating peacefully to it's destination. And just at that moment when someone at my side says, "There! It's gone!" there are other eyes watching it's coming and other voices ready to take up the glad shout, "Here it comes!" So is my brother Buddy passed over to the loving arms of our parent's and the God who made us all.
Happy Birthday in Heaven dear brother Buddy, you are so in our hearts, you can never be gone.
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